Issue link: https://digital.copcomm.com/i/1151132
unconscious brings people (or a plot) that create a polarity. And hopefully, the solution lies somewhere in the middle of the two. Here's an example: Harriet's Dream Harriet dreamed her brother-in-law was murdered. In waking life, he had just telephoned the day before. Actually, she almost didn't answer the phone when he called because she was busy. Now, in the dream, Harriet felt so relieved that she had spoken to him. "If I had not taken the call," she said, "I would have felt so guilty!" This dream occurred immediately after boxer Mike Tyson had violently bitten someone's ear off. In the dream, he was the murderer. Her brother-in-law's wife had to tell their mother the sad news. Although Harriet felt complete panic because her brother-in-law was murdered, in the dream she also felt a sense of relief that she had answered the phone the previous day. When I asked her to describe her associations to him, she said her brother-in-law is a sensitive, loving, caring person, and added, "He is also extremely organized and efficient." Asked about his wife, Harriet offered, "She's more easy going and carefree, loose and relaxed. She keeps her house messy." Already, we see two polarities present themselves. One is of "panic" versus "relief," and the other is "orderly" versus "messy." Waking Life The dream was in essence about Harriet's husband's recent decision to move to downtown Seattle from their home in rural Maine. On the one hand, Harriet felt "relieved" to move back to city life, after being bored where they lived. Then again, "panic" was setting in because, like her brother-in-law's wife, Harriet's house was in a state of "disorganization." She felt panic because the move was coming up very quickly. Metaphorically, we could say that the ability to be organized was the part of Harriet's personality that was "murdered." The Solution Let's discuss anxiety versus action. Anxiety happens in our head. It's something we conjure up with thought. In this case, Harriet's anxiety comes from contemplating her move, which in fact isn't happening at this actual moment. It's going to happen, but not yet. Action, on the other hand, means making physical movement right now. Harriett can start organizing and packing right away. The truth is when you are in motion, there is no anxiety. Anxiety is future-oriented. The movement gets not only your body in motion, but it focuses your thoughts on what you are doing in the moment. Harriet was sitting still in her state of panic and disorganization. A dream's goal in presenting polarities is typically to help the dreamer move off the extreme behavior he or she is holding on to and move toward the middle of the spectrum. Look at the action or movement in the dream. Even though she was distracted, Harriet took care of business when she answered the phone. Her taking "action" had Harriet feeling relieved. There's the solution right there. Harriet needed to become more like her brother-in-law and take action. Adopting her brother-in-law's style of organizing her house for the move would serve two purposes: to become busy so she had little time to panic, and to get ready for the move. As this example shows, there is so much to be learned from our dreams! To learn more about dream analyst Layne Dalfen, visit www.haveagreat dream.com. BECOMES LIGHT BY LAYNE DALFEN Painting by David Young August/September 2019 19