Whole Life Magazine

February/March 2020

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February/March 2020 13 healthy living SEX TALK "A sleep at the wheel" is an expression that can too easily become an accurate description of how we move through our days and show up in our relationships. Our senses become dulled. We don't smell or taste what we consume. We hurry through the simple practices of hygiene, never feeling our hands running across our own bodies in washing. It's no wonder that so many sex lives turn into a rut of repetitive actions. Breaking out of our own internal prisons is a bold act of revolution and whether it applies most to your work, your relationships, or your sex life, the following list of tips practiced consistently will shake your internal chains free and wake you up to a life of surprises! 1. Take risks. Living on the edge of our own comfort zones is a prerequisite to both truly appreciating what you have and opening up to new possibilities. Not knowing what might happen next is edgy and in many ways more exciting than watching a scary movie because the consequences are yours. You can start small, maybe trying a new kind of food or going to a new place to shop. Placing yourself in the midst of not knowing what will happen next wakes you up to what you do know. 2. Move your body. The statistics on the number of people who are relatively stationary, even in sex, is astounding. How we learn about who we are starts from the time we are born through our ability to move. Babies spend their entire waking life reaching beyond their capacity to experience the world. Tap into that little baby still living somewhere inside you and be willing to risk the physical discomfort of arduous exercise, longer walks, new sexual positions. Truly the pain associated with using your body fully is much more interesting than the slow atrophy of sitting on a couch. 3. Use your senses. Be deliberate about learning more about your capacity to see, hear, feel, smell, and taste. Adopt an attitude of savoring which will add at least a couple of moments to every sensory experience. Look at colors around you. Imagine painting them. Listen for the subtle noises around you. Train yourself to hear the quieter voice in your own mind. Take time to taste individual ingredients when you cook. Slow down and linger over a single bite. Smell the air around you. Really feel how it feels to have a hand trace slowly up your back. Stay longer in a hug and feel the weight of someone leaning into you. 4. Make better habits. We are what we do every day. Choose to be challenged by your daily activities. Develop daily practices that heal and become the framework for everything else that happens to us. Add a few minutes of meditation and be amazed how turning your attention inward focuses all the noise around you. Exercise routines that become habitual are harder to break and the sense of accomplishment associated with strengthening the body travels into everything. 5. Make love more. Any kind of love. Explore and expand the pleasure centers in your own body. Give things away. Pay full attention to whomever is interacting with you. Allow people to be who they are and take that permission for yourself. Feel the visceral truth of gratitude even for the smallest life experiences. Ask for more love. Look for the love coming at you every day. It will wake you up. Wendy Strgar, writer, teacher, and loveologist, is the founder and CEO of Good Clean Love, makers of Almost Naked 95%-organic lubricant. IT'S TIME! 5 Ways to Wake Up to Love By Wendy Strgar Allow people to be who they are and take that permission for yourself.

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